LBDM Episode 28: J.J.
and Dee Dee
Yesterday, I turned 53 years old. When I was a teenager or even in my twenties, I never thought about being in my 50s. I never thought about what life would be like at that age, or having grandkids, or whether or not I’d lose my hair by then. (We know the answer to that question now however- dang) Anyway, I am extremely blessed and thankful to have seen 53 years, and I’m 53 years young, not old. Mentally, I feel young, physically, well, not so much. I really miss playing tackle football in the front yard, on a grass field, or in a cement parking lot (yeah, we did that a few times) or being able to play basketball from sun-up to sundown- now I’m doing good if I can last five to ten minutes.
Speaking of playing football on cement and September birthdays, I’m giving shout-outs to a couple of special classmates/friends of mine; one who I saw here at work picking up his son a few days ago, and one who I consider my big sister from a different mother.
He can correct me if I’m wrong, but I’m sure John Johnson celebrated a birthday this month, either on the 14th or 15th- (If I’m right, my memory must be super-sharp). The last time I saw John was maybe two or three years ago at Super 1’s, so it was great to see him again after all this time. Of course we talked about the good ‘ol days and the bad new days, and we basically gave his son a history lesson on what life was like back in the day, how there was more respect shown, more courtesy shown, how we could make it with only 2 or 3 channels to watch on TV, and how if you had a baloney sandwich and a gingerbread cake (or honey bun), you had a meal worth remembering (well, not really). Anyway, John and I go way back to our days at Judson, where we basically became friends through playing football. I remember John being bigger and taller than me the entire time at Judson, and I also remember him being quite fast for his size. Not saying he was fat, because he wasn’t, he was just really big and fast, like a Herschel Walker back in the day. I want to say John played fullback and on the defensive line back then for the Blue Devils, but I’m not for certain. Where ever he played, he was very, very good. Whenever we played toss-up football, I can remember a few times running after him when he broke a long run, and sometimes not catching him. We became friends from week one in the 6th grade at JMS, and we’ve been friends ever since. He’s never said one bad word about me ever, and that has gone both ways. He’s a class guy, always has been, always will be. He told me a story about something that happened before our game with Lufkin when we were on the Lobo football team that involved another friend/classmate of ours (Tommy Taylor) that I truly wish I could tell here, but for obvious reasons I can’t. Let’s just say I finally learned why the Lufkin football team, its fans, and some of the Lufkin administration were so pissed off that night before we played them. (Funny I should use the word “pissed” right there- how ironic- ha ha- Thank you for telling me that story, John.) Anyway I was glad to see him, and although he’s had some serious health issues in the past, he looked good and was in great spirits. Talking to him was like being at Judson all over again.
My other birthday shout-out goes out to someone who was born 8 days and a year before me (September 20- September 28) and is someone I’ve looked up to for over 45 years, believe it or not. We first met in the first grade at East Ward Elementary (Everhart now), we had the same first and second grade class together, and unfortunately never had another class together ever again. Yet, in the years since we graduated, we’ve become as close as brothers and sisters. I consider her my “big sister” since she’s a whole year older than me (Lol), and I’m her “little brother”. We can talk to each other about anything, and she’s as beautiful inside as she is on the outside. The way Deyavor (Dee Dee) Harnage and I first met is kinda funny because it happened way back in the first grade. Dee Dee has always been outgoing and outspoken at times, and the first grade was no different. Dee Dee was (and is) probably the smartest and most talented girl I’ve ever known and back then, Dee Dee was making A’s right and left and kinda bragging about it. I was new and some of the guys who didn’t like girls period or hearing them brag let Dee Dee know that there was (probably) a new sheriff in town when it came to whom made the highest grades in class. Dee Dee, being the bigger and taller girl she was back then, came up to me and let me know that no little no-account boy beats her at anything, and the war was on for the next year or so. I could sometimes do better than her on our school work, but when it came to music, and singing, and playing instruments, and arts and crafts, and cheerleading, and sports, and P.E., she was the most talented child I’d ever seen. And of course, she was pretty. I wouldn’t have told her that back then as I was still at least a year behind when it came to puberty, but she was nowhere near ugly either.
Dee Dee and I were like friendly rivals in the 1st grade; we became really good friends in the 2nd grade. We also attended the same church for a while back then, so we saw a lot of one another. And although she doesn’t remember a whole lot about the second grade, I do, at least, and we had some good times together that year. (It helps that I have pictures of us during that year, so I guess that helps me continue to remember.) Two instances that I will never forget about that year always remind me how lasting our friendship has been. (There was a third, but I mentioned it in my book, so I’m not going to mention it here. Read the book. Ha ha.) First, I remember we used to sit at a table and read to one another when it was reading time because we both loved to read and I guess we liked reading to each other. Anyway, we always sat together and read the second grade books that were popular at the time- like Zip Pop Go and Blue Dilly Dilly (maybe those were 1st grade books-) and the small fiction books which were interesting also. Second, and I’ll NEVER forget this as long as I live- We were running a race, I think 2nd grade vs the 3rd grade, and we all took turns running to a fence and running back and tagging the next person to run. The team which had everyone run first was considered the winner. When it was my turn and I got tagged, I ran to the fence and touched it, but when I got ready to turn and run back and tag the next person, my foot and ankle got caught underneath the fence, which was a chain-link fence by the way, and the bottom wire had went through my sock and into my ankle and I was caught and couldn’t pull loose without taking part of my ankle with it. I yelled, partly from pain and trying to get the teacher’s attention that I was stuck, but she just looked at me and told the other kids on the other team to keep running until they ultimately won. At first, my teammates were yelling at me then they realized I was caught and might be hurt, and since the teacher wasn’t trying to do anything to help me, they just stood there and didn’t know what to do. Finally the race was over, and we had lost, and the teacher callously told the class to go back into the building and just left me stuck to the fence. I was ANGRY and trying to hold back the tears (tears of anger and pain), then I looked and Deyavor, Jennifer Anderson, and Joanna Rodgers came to me and Deyavor helped me get my foot and ankle untangled from the fence, while Jennifer and Joanna tried to console me. Yes, it tore skin and I bled pretty good and I have a scar there to this day on my ankle and foot, but I will NEVER forget the kindness shown by Deyavor, Jennifer, and Joanna to help me and not leave me behind like the rest of the class and that piece of trash teacher did. Deyavor especially could’ve been like, “EWWW”, but she didn’t care about how gross it looked and I’ll never forget that.
My family moved away from Longview after that second grade year, and we came back my 5th grade year, and although Dee Dee and I weren’t attending the same school at the time, we saw each other a couple of times and said hi, but that was it. We attended different middle schools, and when we finally entered high school together, we knew each other but so much time had passed, we were almost like strangers. I never did have a class with Dee Dee the entire time in high school (which was a tragedy), and the closest we came to interacting was our Junior year when I was given a locker by one of my friends that was next to a locker that Dee Dee and Jackie Moore shared. I spoke a few times to her that year, nothing more than hi and how are you doing, and she signed my yearbook at the end of the year, but because I was still trying to overcome my shyness, I just was basically afraid to talk to her. (Yes, it was silly in retrospect, but Dee Dee was at a way higher level than most girls in every way-!)
Finally, the night after we graduated from high school (I think), I decided to give her a call. To this day, I don’t know what made me do it, but I just made up my mind and did it. And she answered the phone and I told her it was me and we had eight years’ worth of conversation in FOUR hours. It was like we were kids again, but better, we were the friends we had always been and nothing had changed except we were older. And it’s funny because Deyavor was the FIRST girl who ever called me back when we were in the second grade, and ten years later, I call her back. And from that time on, we’ve been like brother and sister. I would not trade the relationship I have with her for anything in the world- we talk/communicate at least once a week and when you’re close to someone who’s known you since you were 5 years old, who isn’t your mom or dad or some other family member, well, that makes them just as much family as your blood relatives. Dee Dee, if you’re reading this and I hope you are- if not, you’ll be getting a text shortly- you’ll always be my big and older and wiser sister; I love you to death and please don’t ever change. Happy Birthday!
